68=69-1 Do you know what does position 68 mean? .......You are doing me and I owe you one!! Free funny text messages.

Dirty talk When a man talks dirty to a woman it's sexual harassment. When a woman talks dirty to a man, it's $3.95 per minute. Free funny text messages.

Laziness Hard work has a future payoff. Laziness pays off NOW Free funny text messages.

Rings First the engagement ring, then the wedding ring, at the end suffeRING!!! Free funny text messages.

Unique Always remember you're unique, just like everyone else. Free funny text messages.

Man's mind Never let a man's mind wander; it's too little to be out on its own!!!! Free funny text messages.

DifferenceQ: What is the difference between a wife and a girlfriend?
A: About 45 pounds!! Free funny text messages.

Do not dring and drive I think drinking and driving is terrible. You always spill it when you change gears... Free funny text messages.

Elephant and a man What did the elephant say to the naked man?
How do you breathe through that thing? Free funny text messages.

Stars Aim for the stars, but first aim for their bodyguards. Free funny text messages.

Goldfish in a tank Two goldfish are in a tank. One says to the other, "Do you know how to drive this thing?" Free funny text messages.

17 inches big Why was Phillip's girlfriend annoyed?
Coz she found out that Phillips 17 inch was a TV. Free funny text messages.

Female vs male Why were males created before females?
Coz you always need a rough draft before the final copy. Free funny text messages.

Talk to her What do you say to a woman with 2 black eyes?
You don't, you've told her twice already! Free funny text messages.

Kids I like kids. But I don't think I could eat a whole one. Free funny text messages.

Honey, I'm home! What are 3 words you never want to hear whilst making love? Honey, I'm home! Free funny text messages.

Men and toilet rolls Q: How many men does it take to change a toilet roll?
A: We don't know. Never happens. Free funny text messages.

Men and feelings Why don't men often show their true feelings?
- Because they don't have any. Free funny text messages.

Joke A priest, a rabbi and a vicar walk into a bar. The barman says, "Is this some kind of joke?" Free funny text messages.

Hungry sandwich A hungry sandwich walks into a bar. The barman says "Sorry we don't serve food in here" Free funny text messages.

It's a miracle Do you know what's the difference between you getting laid, and the pope getting laid? If the pope gets laid, it's a sin, and if you get laid, it's a miracle!! Free funny text messages.

Pregnant?!?! What two things in the air can make a girl pregnant? HER FEET Free funny text messages.